this was written last October when Naylah was last hospitalized. As I was staring at her I couldn't help but wish she wasn't in that bed. So small, and already went through way too much.
Dear child as I see you laying in this bed
I can't find words to ease your struggles
So small that I can't seem to understand
why you have to go through all this pain
Too small to express what you feel
Can't tell your momma what's happening
I look in your eyes I see life
I touch your heart I feel your love
I see your smile and nothing seems to be wrong
But we see your daily troubles
We see you trying so hard to communicate
Your frustration that we can't understand
I wish I could take your pain away
Put it all in my back , I would carry it without a problem because you are all I ve got
I hate to see you between doctors and hospitals
Dealing with therapy and home nursing
Having to take all those meds to make you feel better
I wish you could enjoy childhood like everyone else around you
I wish that your world wasn't involved only medically
Instead it would be involved around playing dolls, building blocks and dress up only.
I wish you didn't need all those medical team
And that you didn't know anything about syringes, monitors, what's your heart rate and feeding tubes
I wish you only knew about books, running around, getting into things and putting mommy in tons of troubles.
As I watch you sleep in this hospital bed I dream that we were elsewhere
Somewhere magical where you could be the child you should be where the only worry would be playing with your dolls
Just for a day
No meds, no nurses , no therapies no doctors telling us what needs to be done next and making all those plans ahead for you.
I wish mommy could find a cure to your struggles
As I watch you in this bed, I wish I could take your spot .